The Tamesis
Picture this: Your friend is getting married, but now they have another question. Will you be their MC?
Inviting a loved one to officiate your wedding seems to be a growing trend. Having a close friend or family member legally marry you can add a whole new dimension to your relationship and inject an extra personal element into your wedding. It was an honor to be invited, but of course, there was a lot of pressure. First of all, where do you start?
Read on for this guide on how to host a wedding for the first time, and hopefully there will be more like this in your future.
Yes, you need to be ordained
You are here today to get two people legally married, but don’t forget that you need to pass the law as well. If this is your first wedding as a wedding officiant, you will need to accept your appointment. You may have heard that you can be ordained online. fortunately it yes Achieving this is very simple.
There are several interfaith, nondenominational, or religious organizations that offer online ordination, such as Universal Life Church and American Marriage Ministries. Marriage laws vary from state to state, so be sure to double-check legal requirements with your county clerk’s office. In some cases, you may need to register specifically with the state’s officiant registry. There are also many forms that need to be filled out and deadlines adhered to so that any marriage you perform will be recognized by the law.
In some cases, a couple may be legally married before the wedding. For example, two people may choose to have a legal courthouse wedding where they live and then travel to another country for a destination wedding. If this is your situation, technically you don’t have to be named a moderator. But you should definitely have a speech prepared for the ceremony.
Some states (including New York, California, Massachusetts, Vermont, and Rhode Island) allow you to obtain a one-day officiant license to legally get married. In New York City, anyone over the age of 18 can get a one-day driver’s license for a $25 fee and is only valid for the specific couple you list on your application.
Commit to your role
You may not have to take the oath to be the wedding officiant, but a simple “yes” is a binding commitment to the couple. Once you decide to officiate your wedding, there is no turning back. Don’t risk ruining your loved one’s special day by postponing your wedding script or canceling a month in advance. Hosting is a time-consuming and intimate role, so make sure you fully understand your responsibilities before taking the plunge.
Homework makes the ceremony go smoothly
Aside from being a couple, you probably have the most important role of the day, so you definitely shouldn’t wing it. Meet with the couple (preferably multiple times) to discuss what is expected of you. How long do they want the wedding to take? Do they want to say their wedding vows? What tone do they want? Don’t forget to check the facts, too. You could swear they met at an exotic beach fire, but was it actually a tiki bar in Chinatown? They’ll give you a road map so you don’t hit the road alone.
just the two of us
A soon-to-be newlywed may be giving you the job because you have some intimate knowledge of one or both of them. They don’t want you to wax poetic about marriage or quote quotes from the day. They ask you because they know you, and more importantly, because you know them. That’s what weddings are about: them! Which one of their two stories is your favorite? When did you know their path would end in marriage? What you may lack in decades-long marital wisdom, you make up for with special stories about the couple.
