Addressed: Can I Wear Flip-Flops in the City?

collage Fashion

Is wearing flip-flops in town really such a dirty act? Is it a sin to let my Lolita-like chaste, polished heels scrape against the festering pavement? Whenever it gets a little hot in New York, there’s another annoying discussion about whether it’s kosher to leave our chunky little toes exposed and whether to wear rubber flip-flops from Havaianas or leather “flip-flop” sandals from The Row.

Critics of flip-flops say the display of toes is disgusting. No one wants to see a gangly, hunched phalanx squirming like a pack of circumcised hot dogs. They also don’t want to see hairy big toes scurrying around. Likewise, persistent coldness doesn’t even help with the green tea “special” spa package at your local pedicure center. Over the past few years, “showing your toes” has become akin to releasing your nipples or your butt crack. (Someone paged Floyd). Being naked from the ankle down has become a lewd sartorial practice—a phalangeal felony.

Yes, we can laugh at the cautious naysayers who say they hate seeing feet, but the truth is there are many safety concerns with wearing flip-flops. Just this morning I was chatting with a woman who told me that her mother breaks her little toe every summer because it gets weird and keeps slipping off the edge of her flip-flops. (Beauty is pain, she wears them all the time.) I’m guilty too. A few years ago, my Russian OB/GYN waggled her finger at my flip-flops, pointed at my pregnant belly, and told me that “high heels” were a no-no and that I might trip over them.

Dr. Rock Positano, a Manhattan foot specialist with whom I spoke a few years ago about “hot feet” when foggy PVC shoes were all the rage, also waxed poetic about the risks of walking in flip-flops, especially for long periods of time. Positano received calls from clients vacationing in the “Italian Islands” who said walking was painful after hours of wobbling around in flip-flops. “People don’t realize that when you’re on vacation, your walking speed and standing speed basically quadruple,” he said. “The feet, ankles and lower limbs are not used to this.”

Lately I’ve really started to worry about my bare feet on the Brooklyn sidewalks. As I walked in flip-flops from a beach gift shop to the subway, my toes came dangerously close to a mysterious puddle of city sewage. The thought of accidentally stepping into a black mouse hole makes me excited nausea.