The Tamesis
“Egg Unwrapped” by Jeffrey Steingarten was originally published in the May 2003 issue Fashion.
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There are thirteen ways to cook an egg,” said Didier Elena, standing in the kitchen. “Egg omelette, omelette, omelette, omelette, omelette, omelette, omelette, baked omelette, omelette, omelette and omelette By pie, he continued, he meant baked, fried, poached, medium-rare (five to seven minutes), slow-cooked, molded, medium-rare (three minutes), scrambled, and well-cooked, as well as omelets and cold eggs wrapped in fleshy, crystalline aspic. By the time he was thirteen, he had added two more dishes that relied entirely on eggs—a soufflé that was both sweet and salty, and a fluffy egg spread known as a soufflé. Sabayon.
“In fact,” Didier points out, “there are 422 ways to boil an egg.” Most of them are variations on the central thirteenth. Didier recommended Le Répertoire de la Cuisine, Written by Louis Saulnier and originally published in Paris in 1914, this compendium of more than 6,000 names and short oral recipes summarizes the state of haute French cuisine (now known as haute brevede) 90 years ago. I own the book but have never mastered it, so what impresses me most is the ability of the French (more accurately, the free people) to come up with 6000 different names for anything. However, even after inventing 422 egg dishes, the French (ibid.) never tried, and probably never even imagined, the beautiful “1000-year-old egg” in Irving Penn’s stunning photo on the back. Of course, these are all Chinese, made by coating duck eggs in a paste of salt, wood ash, lime and black tea, then burying them in rice husks in giant ceramic pots for 100 days. I guess they look about 1000 years old. Thousand-year-old eggs can also be delicious. Peel, cut into quarters and serve with a dipping sauce of soy sauce, vinegar, rice wine and grated ginger.
To me, there’s nothing like a simple omelette. I admitted to Didier that I needed to start from scratch, that I had never made an acceptable omelet. Finally I had enough courage to face it. Saulnier lists 85 varieties of omelets, from Américaine, Andalouse and Archiduc to Turque, Vichy and Victoria. They only differ in what you put inside them and sometimes what you put on top and around them. What sounded most appetizing was the Brillat-Savarin omelette, stuffed with diced pheasant and black truffles and surrounded by rich game gravy. There’s also the Durand, which starts with eggs mixed with a base of mushrooms and artichokes warmed in butter; and finally, an omelette is wrapped around asparagus tips and surrounded by tomato sauce.
My wishes are more modest. All I want to do is learn to make the simplest little omelet. “Making an omelet is both very easy and very difficult,” Saulnier told us. “The whole process needs to be fast, and it takes a long time of practice to achieve perfection.” That’s what they all said. I needed practical guidance and Didier Elena seemed like the perfect choice. Didier, 31, is a consummate chef with rigorous classical training and is the head chef at one of New York City’s finest restaurants, Alain Ducasse’s (Essex House Hotel in New York City). I called him and he agreed to my plan. I’m going to Ducasse Kitchen in a week.
In the meantime, I reviewed my recipes. Omelets can be sweet or savory, flat or wrapped in an oval shape. What I wanted was a delicious oval shape. Often called a regular omelette, this is made with eggs cooked in butter and then formed into a nice, compact shape.
